Friday, September 2, 2011

A gem of a week

Diamond Lake has been good to us. The kids splashed and fought and rowed and wrestled and laughed. The grown ups cooked and drank and issued threats and applied sunscreen and loved.

And for these four, they have spent their last week before starting kindergarten together, together.



On Tuesday they will head to the beautiful old school building a few blocks from their houses, meet their teachers and classmates and begin the long, strange trip which is growing up away from your families, at school.

I feel delightfully sad.

This transition marks the beginning of losing so many things that have held true about our relationship since he was born: how physically close Hayden and I are. How he tells me everything, needs me for everything, looks to me for guidance in all situations and decisions.

It is delightful because i have lived the past 5 and a half years being (almost) everything to him. I have lived it and savored it breathed it in and soaked it up and been driven crazy by it and been present with it and I am ready to move on. I am excited about what is to come and how our relationship will change and grow as he does. I am ready to start to get some space in my head back to use on things that do not have to do with him.

Delightful. Sad.

And to my son, as he walks through those doors: no matter what lies ahead, be true to yourself. Be willing to look hard for what you delight in, and don't give up searching if the answer is not easy to find. Be enthralled with cephalopods even when they cool kids aren't. Stick up for those who are having a tough time. Admit when you are one of them, and ask for help. Be vulnerable. Question authority, weather it comes in the form of a popular peer or a teacher. Love your friends deeply and don't sweat the significant other thing for as long as you can. Laugh at yourself. Don't forget to pull up your pants before you come out of the bathroom stall. And love your mother.


5 comments:

Amelia said...

Oh heartbreaking.

caroline flanders said...

fantastic post. good luck with the transition!

anymommy said...

Beautiful little Kindergartners, all of them. He will, he will, he will. I know it because he has you as his mother.

Anonymous said...

This is beautiful, Lisa. Thanks

Ernesto Beltran I said...

Stumbled upon this, and glad I did. Very warm and heartfelt read.