tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-31302981444235344512012-02-01T18:08:27.638-08:00Once an up and coming international health worker living all over the world, now a stay at home mom in Eastern Washington. What's most suprising to me isn't that I live near the border of Idaho but that I actually kinda like it...Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.comBlogger791100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-8655454249239681902012-01-31T10:00:00.000-08:002012-01-31T10:42:43.713-08:00

I sleep with my iphone.  It is a horrible habit, I know.  Although I now listen to the radio on it as I fall asleep and may spend a little too much time every night playing Boxicon it started off a well intentioned decision.  When we got rid of our land line I started keeping the phone next to me at night *just in case*;  And while I liked to pretend like that was a nebulous *just in case* that

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-50729848265229519272012-01-19T08:33:00.000-08:002012-01-19T08:34:05.578-08:00

Don't go.  Not to be a downer or anything, and not that we didn't have a really truly awesome time but holy shit there is a lot going on at that place.  Every light fixture is also equipped with a speaker which is constantly playing music appropriate to your current local.  Fantasyland is pumping with Be Our Guest and Once Upon a Dream, while Adventureland boasts the Indiana Jones Theme Song.  

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-68973185438827441192012-01-09T13:22:00.000-08:002012-01-09T16:31:39.270-08:00

How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat? How can you produce and participate in a show featuring writers if you don't write? The former is a question pondered by Roger Waters and my kids, the latter by me. I have known for almost a year that there would be a  Second Annual Listen To Your Mother Spokane.  I have been so excited to get going with the audition announcement (which

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-75504788773379223712011-09-02T19:45:00.001-07:002011-09-02T19:45:45.682-07:00

Diamond Lake has been good to us. The kids splashed and fought and rowed and wrestled and laughed. The grown ups cooked and drank and issued threats and applied sunscreen and loved.And for these four, they have spent their last week before starting kindergarten together, together. On Tuesday they will head to the beautiful old school building a few blocks from their houses, meet their teachers

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-79795348608614061832011-08-31T12:53:00.001-07:002011-08-31T12:53:43.692-07:00

We've upped our kid count by 2 for the day, but it's worth it since they are adorable and accompanied but their witty and sarcastic and delightful mother. Last night was the best sleep night yet - some of them were too nackered to wreak havoc, some of them were preemptively sent to separate bedrooms, and Hayden had been stung by 3 bees so even though he was showing no signs of any kind of

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-49150313396327105932011-08-29T20:15:00.001-07:002011-08-29T20:15:18.302-07:00

don't worry, Garrett isn't drowning....We knew at 6am that it was going to be a long day. We slogged it out, skipped naps in hopes of a better tonight and, well...here are the numbers:5:30pm - 1 out of nine down6:15 - 3 down. We've weeded out those who should have napped and are feeling cocky. 6:30 - the remaining 6 are lined up in the loft and put to bed. We retreat

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-23819701877787159622011-08-29T09:13:00.001-07:002011-08-29T09:22:18.198-07:00

Stacey, Kristina and I are at the lake for a week. (That's how it works up here in the Great Inland Empire, you just say "the lake" because it is uncouth to specify the lake by name, even though there are approximately 772 lakes in the area.) Just us girls, plus our collective brood of 9 kids ages 6 and under. Stacey and I arrived yesterday to lakeside bliss: beautiful cabin, good swimming

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-49325873632958689922011-08-24T16:16:00.000-07:002011-08-24T16:16:15.393-07:00

I've known it for a few days - she's gotta go.  Matilda2 is sick.  Her poop is gooping up, hardening, and backing up.  Her hips seem to have given out.  She can't walk.  I mentioned it to Jeremy and he said he would do the deed, take her our, wack her.  Matilda2 is a chicken, by the way.  (Yes, there was a Matilda1, she is no longer with us; her blood is not on our hands but on Einstein's paws, 

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-91264840399555363612011-07-05T14:16:00.000-07:002011-07-05T14:16:08.375-07:00

If I was on top of things, like a certain someone I know, I would have written you a beautiful, funny and only mildly boastful post about how my kids are in the new Dolly Parton video.  But I am not.  Stacey is.  So check out her post for the whole story and whatever you do, do *not* blink between the 2:43 and 2:47 mark in the video. Hee hee haa haa my kids are in a Dolly Parton Video!! In

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-28090150505047685602011-06-29T15:05:00.000-07:002011-06-29T15:05:59.531-07:00

(At the outset of this post let me say that I love my husband very much.  I loved him the day we got married and I knew that together we would never be bored, and we would always be partners.  This sentiment has only grown since our wedding day.  That said, we have fights like everyone and sometimes they annoy or amuse me enough to write about.  So no need to call the mediators or lawyers, just

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-67715383972293307592011-06-21T07:13:00.000-07:002011-06-21T08:30:35.834-07:00

We spent the week on the Olympic Peninsula and Seattle for Jeremy's 40th birthday trip. Jeremy packed the car. This may seem like a heinously boring detail but in the life of our marriage it is actually a fantastic development. If it was up to me I would bung everything in the back of the car and dig it out when it was needed. I would also probably pack furniture - well, at least beach chairs

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-55981576476814200522011-06-15T09:01:00.000-07:002011-06-15T09:29:57.282-07:00

I hate being bored. Not that I think anyone likes it, but throughout my life being bored has gotten me in enough trouble that I know I need to avoid it if possible. I don't mean a leisurely afternoon with nothing planned kind of bored, I love those. I mean "I am sitting on the couch watching drivel on our tv and do not have the energy to get up or do anything" bored which, now that I type it out

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-23422272394450511562011-06-09T10:35:00.000-07:002011-06-09T10:35:54.795-07:00

It never fails - I hear my voice and think there is some whiney child somewhere talking to me and I wish they would be quiet.  I sound like a kid - I don't know why I am surprised, I've lived with this voice for the past 34 (forgot, I'm going to stick on 33) years but there is something about hearing it.... Nevertheless, I am proud to post the video and essay that I read for Listen To Your

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-20714079069081801322011-05-21T17:16:00.000-07:002011-05-21T17:16:47.081-07:00

There is a road up a hill in our town.  It is a steep ascent that levels out for brief periods every thirty feet or so.  Kinda like those old school tall metal slides with bumps in the middle.  I like to gun it up and then let off the gas just as we reach teach apex.  It makes my stomach do a little flip.  Apparently for my son it has a different effect. Hayden - "Weeee!  Mama this is fun!" Zeni

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-30260204410660728972011-04-01T17:32:00.000-07:002011-04-01T17:39:14.152-07:00

Hayden on his first day of school this year - no lunchbox. "Is it a lunchbox day mama?" "Let's check the calendar honey". Hayden's calendar is a throw away from the insurance agent with inspirational quotes for each month.  Barf.  But it serves it's purpose, which is to indicate which days he brings his lunchbox and stays at school until 3 versus coming home and noon.  Tuesdays and Thursdays

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-44750746056380539012011-03-27T09:00:00.000-07:002011-03-27T09:26:15.496-07:00

As a senior in high school I drove cross country with 12 students and 2 teachers in a barely functioning van to spend a time living in the Grand Canyon. It was the first time I had been West of the Mississippi, and with that glimmer at the enormity of the world I knew I wanted more. When I was a junior in college I spent a semester in Zimbabwe. It is embarrassing to remember how little I

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-25876603561880748332011-03-05T17:10:00.000-08:002011-03-05T17:10:37.561-08:00

Last weekend I sat in a room in a school where my kids have gone since before they could walk. I listened to a woman I have known for two years tell a story so beautifully- in a voice shaky but sure; the story truly hers and truly from her heart. It was about pain and loss and love. I had no idea this was a story that the woman carried with her every morning that I saw her at preschool, every

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-57219372720041936082011-03-02T17:32:00.000-08:002011-03-02T19:17:12.368-08:00

Ever since we had kids (and probably before although I didn't spend as much time feeling annoyed about it because we could always go out for a leisurely dinner and talk everything over) Jeremy and I have the same few fights over and over again.  Slight variations, sometimes, but the one we had this evening is quintessential. It's 5:05pm.  Jeremy told me earlier in the day that he would be home

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-79351637355282798432011-02-15T17:13:00.000-08:002011-02-15T17:13:38.499-08:00

I am a bit of a bag lady - I likes me some purses and before I had things like children to spend money on I spent way too much on 'em.  Cute little clutches, funky shoulder bags, leather, tassels, sparkles, I've done it all.  Once my son was born in 2005 I was introduced to a new type of bag, the diaper bag.  I've gone through quite a few, and all share the following characteristics: 1.  Are big

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-39150536594375160942011-01-08T18:05:00.000-08:002011-01-08T18:15:28.553-08:00

One of the best things about having a blog is finding all the other people who have blogs. There are so many amazing, creative women out there who are, at night or during nap time, lunch time, in the bathroom or while Dora is playing on tv, writing! Writing beautifully, movingly, finding an outlet for their creativity and angst and triumphs. My favorite is when I am surprised to find out

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-68990237540635217452010-12-31T19:40:00.000-08:002010-12-31T20:02:13.582-08:00

There are lots of things I love about the month of December. I love lighting the menorah and doing our "Crazy Hanukah Dance" ritual. I love watching as each night more and more houses are lit up beautifully. (Spokane, I have noticed, really goes all out on any holiday for which you can place anything large and/or inflatable and/or set up to play to a tune you can program your radio to pick up.

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-51297078633249266092010-11-17T16:00:00.000-08:002010-11-17T16:47:15.359-08:00

Since she came home I have had a hard time reconciling what I had come to think of as "The Two Zenis":Zeni 1 is Adopted Zeni (AZ). This Zeni is underweight. She is Ethiopian. She has some post-institutionalized-child issues. She was left on the floor of her home, alone, every day for the first 3 months of her life for 5 hours while her bio mom went to work to make money to buy food. When I

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-17279232265408404202010-11-06T17:06:00.000-07:002010-11-06T18:03:21.475-07:00

Holy Crap, my son just had the biggest temper tantrum of his 4th year of life, and his birthday is in December. It was so big my heart is still racing and I had to drive home with the windows open to help calm myself down even though it's 40 degrees outside. It was so big that had I been an outside observer, and there were many of em, I would have wondered if he had some kind of disorder; like

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-75484988828149384792010-11-04T09:13:00.000-07:002010-11-05T14:19:09.432-07:00

So I hit the six week mark of my program - it came rather unserendipitously right after a trip out of town where gluttony in both food and drink (is that repetitive?) were the name of the game.Results: weight loss negligible, centimeter loss more remarkable. I lost 5 centimeters from my "lower abdomen" (read: most blubbery part of body) and some from thighs and calves as well. My chest was

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-73432166640828003822010-10-14T13:30:00.000-07:002010-10-14T13:46:22.637-07:00

I'm hiding from my cleaning guy.He's very, very nice and can clean floors like it's nobody's business. He is usually just finishing up by the time I get home from picking up Hayden but today he was just getting started because a close friend of his died this morning. Horrible, right? So I give him a hug and he starts telling me he thinks Jeremy would be uncomfortable with that. So I am hiding

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-60291984506837415082010-10-10T17:40:00.000-07:002010-10-10T17:46:41.543-07:00

It's starting to get dark here. Not in a metaphoric way - in an I live close to the fucking border of Canada and within a month the sun will be gone by 4pm way.I hate it. Today is a little taste of what's to come - it has been cloudy all day, the sun hasn't cast a shadow since it was first rising this morning. I feel spacey and lethargic, and like I can't quite remember who I am, how I muster

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-40259839128667060862010-10-07T08:13:00.000-07:002010-10-07T08:35:24.366-07:00

I was thinking about my fear of failing and realized that my post about getting in shape was a big fat copp-out.The way I set it up if I succeed, lose weight, get in shape, then I win because I did what I set out to do. If I fail, don't finish or follow through or go right back to my slovenly ways once the program is over, I also succeed at failing in "public". Win-win. Nice, eh?Week 3 of the

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-53559635005439135932010-09-30T18:20:00.001-07:002010-09-30T18:40:11.438-07:00

about weather my and my fine husband were worthy of caring for poultry, I give you this chicken update and let you draw your own conclusions:As you know, we were on chickens number 6, 7, 8 and 9. Chickens 1-5 are no longer with us - detailed account of their (quick) lives and (hopefully quick) deaths here. Last time I was on a replacement chicken run I bought 4 chicks. My thinking was that

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-50476845848336946342010-09-24T18:33:00.000-07:002010-09-24T19:58:12.101-07:00

I have this thing about trying - I don't do it. Or, I didn't. I'm trying to try more.Please find below my boarding-on-pathological reasoning:(Note- my logic applies only to myself- all others are encourages and supported in their trying and not made fun of or thought of as failures regardless of outcome). If you try to do something and you can't do it you have failed. Not only have you failed

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-62822744702101453222010-08-25T13:00:00.000-07:002010-08-25T15:57:41.706-07:00

Random assortment of thoughts and happenings from around the chicken coop:1. No eggs. I freaking DE MITED these chickens in the hopes that their infestation was what was precluding egg production. That basically means I fire-bombed them and their coop with some de-miting agent so maybe it is best that there are no eggs yet since any recently layed may be capable of inducing a third eye in the

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-85323261643844820592010-08-06T12:10:00.000-07:002010-08-06T19:46:50.483-07:00

* this entire post is to make me feel better - read - this entire post is boring and not funny. Muh bad.*Before Zeni came home I knew that being a multiracial family would make us a family that was more noticed and more scrutinized in public. People notice what is out of the ordinary and families of different colors are. It is not a good thing or a bad thing, and I don't think less of people

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-77473329064735404062010-07-17T07:11:00.000-07:002010-07-17T08:03:52.570-07:00

Last week we packed up ye olde vanne and headed to Glacier National Park for our 4th annual family vacation.We didn't plan to make it a tradition, but the park is so beautiful and less than a days drive away and it has become our families *thing*, the thing the kids will probably moan about and beg to get out of in 7 years, but for now are falling over themselves with excitement and looking for

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-73482626562115565312010-07-02T17:00:00.000-07:002010-07-02T20:37:51.808-07:00

If you were a newly hatched chick pecking around in a farm store with your peeps and my family entered the store I would have this piece of advice for you: play dead, look sickly, or make yourself an otherwise unattractive baby chicken specimen. Over the past 2 months we have purchased one chicken coop and 9 chickens. We have 4 left. The sequence of events has been as follows:1. See man on

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-49813072038086318522010-06-27T21:12:00.000-07:002010-06-28T09:22:39.494-07:00

1. That I really, really didn't ever tell my parents anything about what was going on in my life from about age 7 to 20.2. That I started having sex wayyyy too young3. That I was miserable a lot of the time as a kid and I don't think many people knew.4. That I used to throw these little crab apples off the highway overpass and try to hit cars on the way to school.5. That I used to troll

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-74330174710560651652010-01-22T13:48:00.000-08:002010-01-22T14:32:11.529-08:00

It has taken me a long time to grow in to my relationship with Zeni. When she first came home I didn't feel that same kind of primal love for her that I do for my son. I have spent so much time agonizing over everything being equal - do I love them equally? Treat them equally? What would that look like? What would that mean?This week a close friend, without even knowing it, showed me that

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-30388515536319401222010-01-17T18:00:00.000-08:002010-01-17T17:51:49.809-08:00

The holidays are over. We had a great time. Maybe even struck the right balance between presents and not, and secured our 2 Christmas Day traditions: a hike (homage to Jeremy's Colorado roots) and Chinese for dinner (nod to the Jew in me) at whatever we deem the most neon-lit-up joint in town to be.Christmas hike picture. Note one grumpy child, one delirious child.Sigh. Exhale. And look to

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-32061982339617639382009-12-21T15:10:00.000-08:002009-12-21T22:32:16.695-08:00

I took the GREs the first time they were offered on the computer - like a hundred years ago. I remember reading about how the test was programmed as an algorithm. If you got a question right it gave you a harder one - a wrong response meant your next question would be easier. It was like this huge chart where choices carried different consequences and yielded different futures. I spent the

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-37661284711326159472009-12-11T19:04:00.000-08:002009-12-15T10:49:42.647-08:00

History of depression and mania on mother and father's sides? Check.History of depression and anxiety in self? Check.History of responding well to SSRIs? Check.And yet I'm off my meds. Well, not off entirely, I'm switching from one kind to another. But I knew going in that switching meant letting the prozac go out of my system, and waiting for the wellbutrin to kick in. AND it's the

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-17411347140296561092009-07-09T15:15:00.000-07:002009-07-09T16:12:39.011-07:00

It's been awhile, I know. I have been here, in Spokane. I used to be able to write things like "sorry I've been out of touch, the sat. phone in Rwanda was down". Now, not so much. Honestly, I just haven't felt motivated to write anything. I'm sure my one reader will understand.I finished my book club book. It starts out slow but is fantastic, and fantastically depressing. A woman, growing

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-42154010790995967562009-03-06T15:50:00.000-08:002009-03-16T15:50:05.491-07:00

When I first saw Zeni I cried.Not because I immediately fell in love with her, but because all of a sudden it was real. This baby, who we didn't know, was ours. She was coming home with us and three would become four as we added an unknown variable into our family which already felt full of love and joy. I cried because all of a sudden I didn't want to do it. I didn't want another child. I didn't

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-91163978340895797852009-02-18T09:35:00.000-08:002009-02-18T15:04:21.991-08:00

Breaking news: Stay at home mom used to have real life. Used to have passport that had to have extra pages added to fit all the stamps in. Used to have enough frequent flyer miles to hang out in the swank lounges and get upgrades without asking. Used to have a code name used for security purposes ("Flamingo one" - reference, anyone?). Used to have a paycheck and conversations about the politics

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-44947565692191441122009-02-03T06:32:00.000-08:002009-02-03T06:46:40.532-08:00

And I don't mean the version where you have sex with hot strangers in trains.  I mean the part where you cross the country alone, with an active 3 year old and a quiet but demanding 10 month old.  We are in North Carolina right now visiting my parents.  It's been a great trip, and my mom was even kind enough to fly out to Spokane and pick us up since Jeremy has to work.  Sweet deal, right?  

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-3830840727710571642009-01-14T09:30:00.000-08:002009-01-14T09:31:07.594-08:00

My husband is fantastic.We get into ridiculous arguments over things neither of us really care about when we are stressed out about kids, money, life.We get resentful of the other because "you get to hang out with the kids all the time" "Yeah, well you get to leave the house every day, use your brain AND pee by yourself".I yell (yes, I have actually yelled about) his inability to hang up a towel

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-42116814674602575442008-12-30T13:00:00.000-08:002008-12-31T14:08:57.069-08:00

OK, this seems a little melodramatic at noon on Jeremy's day off, but at 4 in the morning it seems not only reasonable but likely.SLEEP DAMN YOU! Just do it! You will be happier, I will be happier, my word finding deficits will abate...I'll start with the little one. I asked the paediatrician yesterday what I could do about the fact that she just doesn't sleep at night. "How much does she sleep?"

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-70239640283464865672008-11-30T19:40:00.000-08:002008-11-30T20:16:17.789-08:00

OK, so I'm half Jewish. My dad's half, which if you're really Jewish doesn't count. And it also probably doesn't count because I've never set foot in a temple, but I'll be damned if I wasn't drinking at the Seder by age 5. Growing up we celebrated Christmas and Chanukkah, but since I left home I've never been a big Christmas fan (or Chanukkah, for that matter, but it is a much easier holiday to

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-56958470225644929152008-11-28T11:44:00.000-08:002008-11-28T14:15:34.240-08:00

This is a tough one. When we started the adoption process I felt fairly certain we would have Zeni escorted home so we didn't have to leave Hayden. As we got further along, I was again quite certain that either I or Jeremy (probably me) would travel, and the other would stay home with Hayden. As we neared travel time, and Zeni was a real person, Jeremy and I felt strongly that we should both

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-23717298875668329162008-11-17T18:35:00.000-08:002008-11-17T19:03:45.501-08:00

She is.Zeni is a beautiful baby. She is teeny and has this creamy brown skin, huge eyes and a mess (my fault) of curly black hair. So yeah, she's cute. But she's not that cute. Everywhere we go people stop me to take a closer look. They ohh and ahh, they call their friends over to take a look, the bolder ones touch her hair while the meeker ones just make goo goo eyes. Yesterday in the grocery

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-37147611468199142662008-11-13T09:23:00.001-08:002008-11-13T09:37:53.523-08:00

OK, I'm no economist. I'm no policy expert. I'm no auto industry employee. I've been listening to NPR this morning talk about the potential bail out of the "big 3" car makers in the US and, while my Detroit born father will probably get pissy with me for saying this, why the hell would we do that?Isn't that the point of capitalism? Risk? The more you risk the more you stand to gain and loose? I

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-69764946177237918652008-11-12T19:38:00.000-08:002008-11-13T09:41:35.131-08:00

No energy.No energy to blog, no energy to talk to my husband, to see friends, no energy to do anything except get through the day trying not to let my fatigue make me one of those moms who is screaming at her poor kids in the parking lot. (Failing on that front, by the way)..I took antibiotics this weekend after a week of no energy, fever, feeling like my throat was on fire. In theory this is a

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-62399947660660332322008-11-05T19:37:00.001-08:002008-11-05T19:48:04.483-08:00

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-37169733199542950582008-10-15T13:01:00.000-07:002008-10-16T11:39:04.203-07:00

Zeni has a flat head and, let's be honest, that's putting it nicely. It's like a sheer freaking cliff back there. She's got a poof of hair to cover it up, but you put the girl in a hat and it's like a sunflower - all beautiful and rounded on one side and one the other - flat. I asked my paediatrician about it: "So" says I, trying to seem nonchalant, "you've probably seen a lot of flat headed kids

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-72893966743187114492008-10-08T13:17:00.000-07:002008-10-08T21:10:36.807-07:00

I don't bathe Hayden. If Jeremy isn't home to do it, it doesn't happen. There's something about it being the end of the day, so close to bed, I have no energy left to admonish splashing, to deal with the tears that follow the water down the drain, to apply lotion.I bathe Zeni every day. I was AND condition her hair, comb it out, and lotion her. I was talking to some friends about it this weekend

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-39127776490351634232008-09-29T17:03:00.001-07:002008-10-06T14:10:56.789-07:00

Fall, 1997. It's my junior year and I am spending it abroad. I choose to go to Zimbabwe - the program purports to teach you about working with grassroots organizations in rural Africa. This is a lie. The program is a fly-by-night operation set up to milk money from dumb rich American college kids. The janitor is our teacher, the "head" of the program a Mugabe lackey, there is a wart hog who runs

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-22193720462793436912008-09-25T14:53:00.000-07:002008-09-25T20:28:03.565-07:00

Travel RestrictionsWhen we went to pick Zeni up we were told that we could take her with us since we were staying in a guest house, but that if we did we could not take her out in public except to the Embassy, and that our agency could provide a babysitter if we wanted to go out. We decided to leave her at the Foster center for the first 5 nights so that we could get some sleep and see some of

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-76596529051719246662008-09-23T14:35:00.000-07:002008-09-23T13:23:28.596-07:00

So there we sat. Me, Jeremy, baby Zeni and her birth mom, Zeni. I had pages of questions. Things like "what did you and the father do while you were dating?" "What was your labour like?" "What kinds of songs did you sing to her?". She looked even younger then she was - 19 she thinks.On the way to meet her, holding Zeni in my lap, my mind was racing. Was this a huge mistake? Would it be so painful

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-17224952649721188812008-09-21T19:16:00.001-07:002008-09-21T19:48:36.710-07:00

Our embassy appointment was on a Wednesday. All we were supposed to bring was our passports - our agency (Gladney) took care of bringing everything else. We had already filled out the zillion government forms and submitted them to our agency representative.You aren't actually allowed to stop a car in front of the Embassy entrance (if you are unsure as to why, google "Islamabad Marriott") so our

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-77269231134692007252008-09-19T15:33:00.000-07:002008-09-21T19:48:17.336-07:00

If it is your first time out of the country, or to a poor country, or too Africa, the prospect of going to Addis to pick up your child(ren) can be daunting. We were there picking up Zeni from August 30 to September 10 2001, and I am planning on doing some posts which describe some of the elements of the trip which are more or less universal to all traveling ET adoptive parents.Obviously, this is

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-28486921965339012572008-09-18T19:20:00.001-07:002008-09-18T19:34:34.061-07:00

We're back. The trip was incredible, Zeni is a great baby who coos and blows spit bubbles, there are so many things I am planning on writing about, but for now all I have to say is SICK.I've seen worms coming out of all but one orifice of the human body. I've been puked on, peed on (and not by my kids), eaten live beetles and drank (drinken? drunk?) snake bile, all with more interest than detest.

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-76043875401445874552008-08-29T21:01:00.000-07:002008-08-29T21:13:24.889-07:00

This is it. 4 suitcases and 2 backpacks stand at the ready next to the front door. Taxi will be here at 3:45am. Passports have been accounted for so many times that I have stopped responding to Jeremy's request that I check "just once more time". Many, many (many many many many) tears have been shed tonight saying goodbye to H. Not in front of him, but for Jeremy after tucking him in and for

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-36265791352084839432008-08-27T14:46:00.001-07:002008-08-27T19:04:11.672-07:00

I have always tried to mark the moment before.In my mind I picture it as a snapshot. I see it through a window frame - a frozen moment where whatever is about to come next does not exist.Having a baby, getting married, seeing a new country - once you experience it you know all about it - how it looks, feels, tastes, sounds, smells. You will carry that knowledge with you the rest of your life. In

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-81515108346755245862008-08-21T19:02:00.000-07:002008-08-21T19:34:22.199-07:00

I decided awhile ago that I would try and breastfeed our daughter for a number of reasons:First, I really miss nursing. I stopped nursing Hayden by the time he was 10 months old because at the time I "couldn't deal" with his need to consume food 24-7. I know it was the right decision for me at the time but in hindsight I wish I had stuck it out for longer. Now that he is older and self propelled

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-31339919161706997972008-08-17T20:22:00.001-07:002008-08-17T20:25:42.111-07:00

Dear Hayden,These are our last days together: you, me and papa, as a 3-person family. I want to shut my eyes and clench my hands and will time to stop; force these perfect days to go slowly. Allow your laughter and your happiness to be never ending and for you to always know what it feels like to be so entirely loved by your parents.I am scared of bringing a new child into our house. I am scared

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-45487917052994935522008-08-07T11:23:00.001-07:002008-08-07T11:24:49.262-07:00

I’m at the airport in Minneapolis and I’m blogging. Really? Really. Wow.Let me start again – I am at the Minneapolis airport ALONE. I’ve just gotten off a flight from Spokane on which IWatched an episode of Nip Tuck (if you’ve never seen it and you like really, really trashy TV you must rent the old seasons – really superb – sorry Jeremy!)SleptDrankTalked to NO ONEI carried on with me one small

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-13546929010563834102008-08-05T12:33:00.000-07:002008-08-05T12:34:47.079-07:00

Birth mom didn't show for court today - they are sending someone to try and find her and bring her to court tomorrow (Wednesday). If she shows we're good to go, if not we're waiting until October.

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-52806922322341614172008-07-31T16:19:00.000-07:002008-08-05T12:35:32.097-07:00

I have been crying a lot over the past three days. Good crying. I've done the whole "I am seriously depressed and un-medicated and can't walk the 4 blocks from my house to office without breaking down in tears". This is different.It started Tuesday. I left Hayden with the sitter and headed out to have some time to myself. As if the free time wasn't enough to bring tears to my eyes, my shuffle-set

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-26892226509280449242008-07-24T14:26:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:31.487-08:00

So Hayden and I are at the mall in a crowded bathroom in a stall. I'm peeing, he is grabbing as much toilet paper as possible.Plop.Hayden stops.He speaks:"Mama! I see your poo poo! It's NASTY mama! It's coming out of your poo poo hole. Nasty mama, nasty!". niiiiccceeee

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-65421643724698436502008-07-22T11:06:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:31.698-08:00

I met Jeremy in 1999 in Kathmandu, Nepal. I had just graduated from college with an ever so useful degree in Sociology, a love for travel and a need to escape a relationship that I couldn't seem to extricate myself from. I landed an amazing job as program coordinator working with Helping Hands (can you tell I just figured out how to put links in?), an organization that brought medical students

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-7369846020875504972008-07-17T20:25:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:31.820-08:00

Just a quick adoption update - Mary called today to tell us we have a court date! August 5th. So for those very, very few of you who are interested (there is definitely some grammatical error in that sentence..) here's how it works:- Our agency has matched us with our daughter (who, by the way, we are thinking we will call "Zeni" - Zeni, like "Zen - e " - it's her birth mom's name - what does

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-48918236392045461052008-07-12T16:39:00.000-07:002008-07-12T19:44:49.935-07:00

It was Friday morning and Hayden and I were taking a walk and meeting friends at the park. I was marveling over how it is possible to completly forget that the beautiful, flower filled summer-perfect street on which I was strolling was not four months ago covered in a foot of snow and I was ready to move to the south. The phone rang. It was a wierd area code - the iphone (which knows so much

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-64674154194646243042008-06-26T20:54:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.102-08:00

Hayden and I had a talk a few days ago about peeing and pooping in the potty. He nodded, excitedly received the new Elmo underwear I bought him and since then has, every time the urge strikes, gone to the potty, sat down, gotten everything in the potty, wiped himself and then disposed of everything and washed his hands.Did you believe me? Even for a second?Unclear why the urge to potty train

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-84484260793844446862008-06-22T20:12:00.001-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.244-08:00

I went to Quaker School from seventh grade on. If it wasn't for my Quaker School, and specifically one amazing teacher, it is quite possible I would not have graduated from high school and quite probable that I would not have gone on to college. I am not particularly religious - with a Jewish dad who doesn't believe in God and a mom who tells tales of scary Catholic school we celebrate Hanukkah,

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-789118476864834322008-06-17T17:32:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.449-08:00

What did the UN say to Israel in 1947?Kidding.There's a new pool by our house- it's pretty impressive. Big water slide, "lazy river" (which is anything but when you're with a 2 year old who insists "let go mama! I swimmmm!!!" and then sinks like a rock only to be wisked down stream below the legs of teenagers in various states of flirtation who are increadibly slow to respond to my cries that

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-91109488633883373712008-06-15T12:10:00.000-07:002008-06-15T12:15:59.061-07:00

We got the call! I thought it would never come, I felt a little nauseous, I opened the email attachment while on the phone with our social worker and my husband, conference called in at work, and saw her – our baby! She was absolutely beautiful and I felt something I wasn’t expecting – love. I really think that’s what it was – I felt like she was a part of our family. I had visions of

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-16062757483804285122008-06-11T14:16:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.591-08:00

Good question.I got pregnant fast. A little too fast –if anyone tells you that you have to wait a few months once you go off the pill before your body can conceive DON’T believe them. Use birth control. Really.I write this not to make light of our good fortune or to belittle anyone's fertility struggles but because I think the fact that we got pregnant so easily added to people's surprise when we

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-91691715962879086782008-06-01T16:28:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.775-08:00

Right. Since last post: decided not to move to NC, stopped process of buying and selling house, got referral for beautiful baby, found out about unexpected circumstances around baby's health, emotional anguish and multiple conversations with physicians, adoption agency, and friends, turned down referral and are back to waiting, but with a heavier heart this time. Phew.Moving on - My son is in

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-28827820103957823542008-04-29T19:57:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:32.988-08:00

How many major life events I can cram into a few months. I would say the runner up would be (1) Graduating from Harvard (2) Getting married (3) Buying my first house (4) Moving to a city I had never before seen (5) getting pregnant (oh, and I think I got a dog in there somewhere, as well...) I managed to cram all of those into six months but if all goes as planned Jeremy and I will create a new

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-578320246147868822008-04-28T07:32:00.000-07:002008-12-10T09:22:33.297-08:00

The short version is that after we talked, Jeremy went snowboarding the next day and I went to the midwife and had my IUD taken out. By the time Jeremy got home that night I had a nagging feeling that I was perhaps acting a bit rash, and the look on his face when I told him what I had done was enough to confirm my suspicion. It sounds crazy, but I think I needed to do that, to be fertile, to have

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-89897673845746446312008-03-20T17:56:00.000-07:002008-03-20T18:13:07.970-07:00

It has been quite a week. Went to the doctor who thought my "pelvis felt asymetrical, could be a cist, probably nothing, let's just get a scan". Knew is was probably nothing, couldn't help but think about my mom who around my age went to the doctor, who felt something wierd, and ended up with an emergency hystirectimy the next day. What if I want to have more biological kids!? Scan was

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3130298144423534451.post-46845088492140120912008-03-13T13:23:00.000-07:002008-03-13T13:36:15.470-07:00

Blogging is totally self serving, right? Why would anyone want to read about my life?I've decided to stop worrying about this - if no one reads this, at least it gives me some time to reflect and write in a way that feels somehow more productive than a journal. I've also been kicking around this idea of a book - a book about adoption for people who already have biological children.My husband and

Harvard to Homemakerhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12905920467303683131noreply@blogger.com2